Author: AlbanFejza

Mathematics is the most exact science of all sciences – it is the perfect epitome of science. However, some semi-professional mathematicians have managed to introduce in the modern books of mathematics confusions which are causing problems with students when they try to understand mathematics. And there are three main issues in mathematics which need to be clarified:

1. “IMAGINARY” NUMBERS
2. INFINITY
3. THE FUNDAMENTAL AXIOM OF MATHEMATICS.

By the way, especially because of the fundamental axiom of mathematics mentioned in part 3, this is the most important article in the history of mathematics. But let’s deal with the less important part first, which has to do with the so called “imaginary numbers”.

1: IMAGINARY NUMBERS

The so-called IMAGINARY NUMBERS are denoted with an “i” in mathematics. Whomever discovered them called them ‘imaginary’ because he thought that he was simply using a dirty trick to solve Quadratic Equations, without realizing that they really existed.

The question arises, “If they are not real, how come they always work?” As a matter of fact, let’s give examples of why the so called ‘imaginary’ numbers are just as real as the real numbers.

This ‘i’ (for ‘imaginary’) is found all over the equations of quantum mechanics which is the basis of modern physics. For example, the Schrodinger Equation has an ‘i’ in it:

Also, the Dirac Equation, has an “i” in it:

So, can you call physics imaginary, which are things which we can touch?

As a matter of fact, Paul Dirac predicted the existence of antimatter simply using this ‘i’ and guess what, today we know that antimatter does exist. It exists in small quantities in the observable universe, and it’s also being produced artificially in high energy accelerators in many labs around the world.

So, in fact, the so-called ‘imaginary’ numbers are real numbers in a perpendicular dimension, which can be a real physical hyper-dimension, like the 4^th dimension and 5^th dimension, as predicted by Einstein’s Theory, or all the way to the 10^th dimension as predicted by String Theory).

So, the ‘i’ is not imaginary at all. It works. How can you call something which always works ‘imaginary’. Equations which deal with electricity have the so called imaginary numbers, and you can try and touch electricity and see if it’s real or imaginary. However, it’s not the mission of this article to fix the books of mathematics, so we can still use the “i” in all the books of mathematics, but the correct way to call them would be to call them “invisible numbers” instead of “imaginary numbers”, because the so called imaginary numbers are real numbers but they are invisible numbers which exist in a perpendicular direction.

In the Quran, this is expressed by verses 69:38-39, which say, “I swear by what you see, and what you do not see”

2: INFINITY

In many well established books of mathematics, you can find the expression:

1+2+3+4+…=-1/12

What they are saying is that if we add all the numbers from 1 all the way to infinity, we will get -1/12.

This value can be reached through the Ramanujan Summation, or the Rieman Zeta Function Regularization, or Analytical Continuation, but in fact none of these methods are pure mathematics. When we use some of these methods, which deal with divergent series, or other things which have implied infinities in them, we are assuming that we can count all the way to infinity, surpass it, come back to zero, and then and only then we would get the value -1/12, for example. But, we already know that we can not count all the way to infinity, so by using these methods, we are assuming something which is not possible. Therefore, adding all the numbers all the way to infinity does not equal to -1/12.

Mathematics is the science of counting, and if you can not count to infinity, it means that Infinity is beyond mathematics. Infinity does not bend to the rules of mathematics, but it is mathematics which bends to the rules of Infinity.

And this can be indirectly implied from many verses in the Quran:

[19:94] He has encompassed them, and has counted them one by one.

[72:28] This is to ascertain that they have delivered their Lord’s messages. He is fully aware of what they have. He has counted the numbers of all things.

[57:3] He is the Alpha and the Omega. He is the Outermost and the Innermost. He is fully aware of all things.

[78:29] We counted everything in a record.

[70:3] From GOD; Possessor of the highest Height.

[40:15] Possessor of the highest ranks, and Ruler of the whole dominion. He sends inspiration, bearing His commands, to whomever He chooses from among His servants, to warn about the Day of Summoning.

[2:15] GOD mocks them, and leads them on in their transgressions, blundering.

And really all the crazy attempts to manipulate with Infinity emerge from the fact that mathematicians do not know, or take for granted the fundamental axiom of mathematics, which is explained below.

3: THE FUNDAMENTAL AXIOM OF MATHEMATICS

Now, let’s get introduced to the fundamental axiom of mathematics. It can be called “THE AXIOM OF EXCLUSIVE IDENTITY”. According to this axiom, each number has an exclusive identity. For example, number 2 is exclusively 2. 3 is exclusively 3. So,

There is no other 3 except for 3.

There is no other 4 except for 4.

There is no other 5 except for 5.

There is no other 6 except for 6.

There is no other 5000 except for 5000.

Even if we write these numbers in two places, the number which was written in one place and the one which were written in another place are still the same number. It’s not two different 3s for example, but only one number 3 exists. Number 3 is the same in the other side of the world, it’s even the same outside of this universe, at another time, in another place, it doesn’t matter, it’s the same 3. That’s why when we add 3 to 4 it always gives us 7, because it’s the same 3 and the same 4. So two different 3s do not exist. So 3 is exclusively 3. It’s not 4, it’s not 5, it’s not another 3, it’s the same 3. Likewise:

There is no other 4 except for 4.

There is no other 5 except for 5.

There is no other 6 except for 6.

There is no other 5000 except for 5000.

There is no other 1,000,000 except for 1,000,000.

And there is no other Infinity except for Infinity.

So, using the Axiom of Exclusive Identity we can reach the conclusion that:

There is no other Infinity except for Infinity.

And here is why this is important. It’s important because using this axiom, when we face the problems arising from Ramanujan Summations, for example, it will be very easy to understand. Here is an example:

Let’s say we try to add the numbers 1+2+3+4+5+…+∞, and this is known to be equal to ((∞+1)*∞)/2. However, once we see that the expression suggests that there will be 1 added ∞ (infinity), then we immediately recognize that it would be another infinity which would be bigger than the previous infinity, which would suggest that there are two infinities. However, this violates the fundamental axiom of mathematics, because according to it, there can be only one infinity. So, this means that the solution to this problem does not exist. So admitting that the fundamental axiom of mathematics supersedes the other rules of mathematics, leads us to the correct conclusion. However, had we applied the rules of mathematics even in cases where they violate the fundamental axiom of mathematics, then we could get the wrong results, while not being aware that we have crossed the boundaries of what mathematics can do. So, the solution to the expression 1+2+3+4+5+…+∞ is simply beyond mathematics.

CONCLUSION:

EVERYTHING is within the scientific scope of mathematics, except for Infinity.

And it is an axiom which extends all the way to INFINITY. This is how we express it in mathematical language, but in religious language, it is expressed in the Quran in many verses like:

[57:3] He is the Alpha and the Omega. He is the Outermost and the Innermost. He is fully aware of all things.

[3:18] GOD bears witness that there is no god except He, and so do the angels and those who possess knowledge. Truthfully and equitably, He is the absolute god; there is no god but He, the Almighty, Most Wise.

The video above shows photo examples of women dressing modestly. They are not wearing short clothes (33:59), or tight clothes (7:22, 7:26), or see-through clothes (7:22, 7:26, 24:31), or high heels (24:31), or makeup (7:31, 2:102), and they all look beautiful (3:14).

Even more, a modest woman is happier (16:97, 19:26), more professional at work (33:59), more respectable at school (33:59), more trustworthy (70:32), smarter (7:27), more dignified (35:10), equal to men (3:195), more approachable to honest men (33:59), and really more beautiful – inside-out (7:26).

Someone who likes to jump the gun might conclude and say, “See, I told you women should wear a Hijab.” But let’s see what the Quran says about that:

These are all the verses, where the word ‘hijab’ is mentioned in the Quran – eight of them:

• [7:46] A barrier (hijab) separates them, while the Purgatory is occupied by people who recognize each side by their looks. They will call the dwellers of Paradise: “Peace be upon you.” They did not enter (Paradise) through wishful thinking.
• [17:45] When you read the Quran, we place between you and those who do not believe in the Hereafter an invisible barrier (hijab).
• [41:5] They said, “Our minds are made up, our ears are deaf to your message, and a barrier (hijab) separates us from you. Do what you want, and so will we.”
• [83:15] Indeed, they will be isolated (hijab), on that day, from their Lord.
• [42:51] No human being can communicate with GOD except through inspiration, or from behind a barrier (hijab), or by sending a messenger through whom He reveals what He wills. He is the Most High, Most Wise.
• [38:32] He then said, “I enjoyed the material things more than I enjoyed worshiping my Lord, until the sun was gone (hijab).
• [19:17] While a barrier (hijab) separated her (Mary) from them, we sent to her our Spirit. He went to her in the form of a human being.
• [33:53] O you who believe, do not enter the prophet’s homes unless you are given permission to eat, nor shall you force such an invitation in any manner. If you are invited, you may enter. When you finish eating, you shall leave; do not engage him in lengthy conversations. This used to hurt the prophet, and he was too shy to tell you. But GOD does not shy away from the truth. If you have to ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a barrier (hijab). This is purer for your hearts and their hearts. You are not to hurt the messenger of GOD. You shall not marry his wives after him, for this would be a gross offense in the sight of GOD.

 So, the word ‘hijab’ according to those verses actually means ‘barrier’ and in the top 5 verses, it talks about a hijab (barrier) which separates disbelievers from God and his word, the sixth verse in the list above about sunset, the seventh verse in the list above talks specifically about Mary, and how God separated her from other men miraculously, so that we can be assured that she did not conceive Jesus through any man. Obviously, the word hijab in this verse is not necessarily talking about hijab for her head, because no one gets pregnant through their head. And, finally, the last verse in the list talks about hijab for men, and it’s only for men during the time of prophet Muhammad. So, where is the hijab for women? Well, there is no such thing as hijab for women in the Quran, but there is clothes for women, and we find them in chapter 24, verse 31. So, verse 24:31 gives the specific dress code for believing women when they are in public, and what it says is that women should cover their chest and their whole bodies except that which is necessary to be uncovered, which we see in verse 5:6 that it is necessary to wash your face, your arms up to the elbows, your head, and your feet.

This means that it is not just to expect women to cover their face, their head, their arms up to the elbows, and their feet. It’s simply not right. God does not ask them to do that, so why should we?

Also, on the other hand, the argument of philosophers who say that “clothes do not make you better” is understandable, but clothes are part of the social construct of being human (7:27), and if you are not wearing clothes, you are going below human (25:44, 5:60, 101:9). Societies which do not wear clothes like Amazon tribes and some very remote parts in Africa, have devolved into extreme poverty, disease, violence, and very often in cannibalism. It’s not really important to go into further details in this subject, but there are two key messages which are important for believing women, and those are:

1. In public, be modest (24:31).
2. In private with your husband, don’t be modest (30:21, 23:6, 7:32, 25:74).

Side note:

Hair, anywhere in your body, and nails are dead cells – no longer part of your body. There is no prohibition in the Quran to color, cut, naturally grow, or pluck them away (7:32). But modesty in public is always closer to holiness (33:33).

By: Alban Fejza, the Clarifying Messenger

For most of us in modern times, our parents neither help us to find a partner, and neither stop us from finding a partner (73:17, 42:14).

And then we are divided into two groups:

1. Those who are ready to fall in many kinds of sins, just so that they can get married.
2. Those who are even more ready to get married, but they do not want to achieve it sinfully. (2:273)

So for this last group of people, after doing a systematic review of ALL the verses in the Quran, we can identify three factors which you might want to keep in mind when considering a marriage partner. And these factors are valid for both males and females. But first, let’s mention some which are not actually that important from the Quran when facing the situation of a potential marriage partner:

• Not religion – So many forced marriages, so many missed opportunities, and even murder have happened simply because religious people did not read the Quran or the Bible carefully. Nowhere in the Quran do we find the prohibition for a man or for a woman to find a partner from a different religion. Yes, marrying an idol-worshiper is prohibited for the believers (2:221), but today you can find idol-worshipers in every religion, and you can also find believers in every religion. So, idol-worship does not have much to do with religion anymore. The Quran associates the allowance to marry someone, with the allowance to eat their food (5:5). So, the question is: Would you eat a chocolate which you buy in the market? You probably would. This means that you are allowed to marry the people who made that chocolate, and they are from different religions. And it does not matter if you are a male or a female, you are equally allowed to marry someone from another religion. Some dogmatic Muslims who have not analyzed this issue carefully, like to point out that the Quran mentions the allowance for men to marry Christian and Jewish women, while it does not mention for women the allowance to marry Christian and Jewish men. But let me tell you, that the Quran also does not mention the allowance for women to marry Muslim men. So, should the women not marry at all? No. The reason why God mentions the allowance for men and not for women is because men are supposed to initiate the marriage proposal, and God reveals the information on a need-to-know basis – so men need to know that, while women can just say “OK” or “Not OK”, to a man from any religion. And remember, what the Quran does not prohibit, it’s not prohibited (6:19, 38, 114, 115; 50:45). After all, religion today is only 2.5% of a person’s character, and more than half of that 2.5% is the same in all religions anyway – so let’s say that 1.5% is the same anyway – so this means that the difference in character between two people due to religion is only 1%. Would you refuse a glass of water, if it is 1% empty? Would you refuse someone, if they are only 1% different from you?
• Not age – It’s so silly and close-minded to say, “He is five years older than me!”, or “She is forty!” or similar statements. (11:72&73)
• Not family – Why would you care if someone’s brother is a bad person for example? You are not going to marry their brother.
• Not race
• Not ethnicity
• Not nationality
• Not social status
• Not wealth
• Not past history – It really does not matter who she was friends with in High-school. People change.
• Not what kind of music they like
• Not cooking abilities
• Not employment status
• etc.

Some people even consider hair color, or body type, or how many friends on Facebook you have. None of these are real factors in marriage.

The Quran gives us only one example of the process of finding a partner for marriage, and it is the example of Moses in chapter 28, verses 22 through 29, and from these verses, and even from the Bible we can deduce that Moses married someone from a different religion, different ethnicity, different race – without considering age, social status and so on.

Now, let’s list the three factors, from the Quran, which if you consider them, you will guarantee yourself a happy marriage:

1. Righteousness (Soul beauty) (24:26). Approximately at your level.
2. Smartness (Mind beauty) (39:9). Approximately at your level.
3. Beauty (Facial beauty) (4:24). Approximately at your level.

And to make these factors practical, we need to add another one:

4. Tolerance (your tolerance and their tolerance) (7:199, 64:14). No one is going to be exactly like you want them to be, and if you are not tolerant, it is never going to work. So, let’s say, you tolerate and marry someone slightly below your league, and God will definitely compensate you for it, or let’s say that you marry someone slightly above your league. Then you should be ready to compensate them with hard work, while letting them relax a little bit more.

Someone might try to prove to you that other factors must also be considered by asking questions like: “Would you marry a child?” The answer to that is: “A child is never smart enough.” “Would you marry a very old person?” Are they beautiful enough? “Would you marry a dogmatic terrorist?” They are not tolerant enough. As you can see, the four above mentioned criteria work, and they include other factors by default. So you do not need to use any other factors, because this article has managed to simplify it for you from thousands of factors, into only four important factors.

Now, pay attention that these are not rules for marriage. Marriage has only two rules, which are (1) Love and (2) Dowry – a gift for the bride (4:24), (See also clarification Marriage and Divorce Rules from the Quran” for further details).

By: Alban Fejza, the Clarifying Messenger

Why Does God Not Answer Our Prayers?

All of you through your life have gone through tough situations, and you probably prayed dearly to God, with prayers like, “Please God, let me pass that exam.” or “Please God, I need that job.” or “Please God, convince that girl to marry me.” or “Please God, bring my husband back.” or “Please God, make my child a believer.” or “Please God, cure my child’s cancer.”, and often you fail the exam, you do not get the job, the girl rejects you, or your husband never comes back, your children hate you, and your child dies from cancer. And a lot of people lose their faith after this.

Atheists tell them, “See, I told you, there is no God.” Religious people tell them, “You did not pray sincerely.” “What?! My child was dying from cancer. Of course, I was praying sincerely.” So then, why did the prayer not get answered? Isn’t it true that the Bible says, “Ask, and it will be given to you.”? (Matthew 7:7) And doesn’t God say in the Quran, “When My servants ask you about Me, I am always near. I answer their prayers when they pray to Me…”? (2:186). So, then why do you not get answers to your prayers? Well, in this video, I show you how to pray and have it answered, guaranteed. But first let me deal with the problem of ‘unanswered’ prayers. To understand why our prayers do not get answered, let’s imagine that your mother has to go shopping and she leaves you with your baby brother and she tells you. “Dinner is on the table, take care of my baby, and whatever you do, don’t turn on the gas stove.”  As soon as she leaves, you turn on the gas stove, leave it on, and the kitchen explodes killing your baby brother. They put you in prison for a short while. The prison is freezing cold, and the guards do not give you blankets. You need a blanket or you are going to freeze, and the guards don’t care. All you have is your mother’s phone number, and you want to call her to send you blanket. You know she is mad at you. You killed her baby. Would you have the courage to ask her? Do you think she should send you blankets? How many times would you have to apologize to her, before she even decides to listen to you? You would probably have to speak to her with the nicest words possible, and promise her to become a good person. You would probably have to say “sorry” a hundred times? Remind her how much you love her. Say “sorry” again. Only then, maybe, and just maybe, you would have the courage to ask her for blankets. Do you think you deserve to get the blankets? Do you think she should respond to your request for blankets? The situation is similar with God; we abused God’s generosity in a similar way, and now it is wrong to ask “Why does God not answer our prayers?” Instead we should ask, “How come God still answers our prayers, even though we betrayed Him?” And the answer is, “Because He forgives, and He forgives, and He forgives.” Now, just like there is always a way to get to your mother’s heart, despite what you have done, there is always a way to appeal to God’s love and have Him answer your prayers.

You need to fulfill 10 conditions to have your prayer answered:

1. Forget the idol (6:41, 17:67). Very often the thing you are asking for in a prayer is actually your idol. For example, let’s say that you fall in love with someone, and you pray to God to make that person love you too. See, as long as you can not stop thinking about that person, and you are seeking their love, that person is your idol. That is the definition of an idol – someone or something you can not stop thinking about and you want to achieve their love – and God will not answer your prayer, because it is a condition to completely forget that person for God to answer your prayer. God says that it is mandatory to forget your idol for your prayer to get answered (6:41, 17:67).
2. Don’t make the same prayer or request to someone else (6:71, 13:14, 17:67, 19:48, 25:68). Some people for example might pray to God to help them get a job, and then they meet a friend who works in that company, and ask them to help them get the job. Well, in this case God can say, “Let your friend answer your prayer.”
3. Be active (7:128, 4:95). If you want a job, did you go to the job interview? If you want your diseases healed, go and visit the doctor, and then God will answer your prayer. God answers the prayers of those who are not lazy.
4. Be steadfast (2:45, 39:53). If you pray to God, and it does not get answered for a while, and you lose your patience and say, “God did not answer it.” If you say that, you cancel your prayer.
5. Believe that your prayer will be answered (13:14). If you don’t believe that a prayer will be answered, it is better not pray at all, because God is not to be tested. We are the ones who are being tested.
6. You must really need what you ask for (6:42, 7:94). You can not be honest about your request, if you don’t really need something.
7. The request needs to be good for you, not bad for you (5:101, 17:11).
8. Gratify God with His beautiful names (7:180, 17:110). Call Him, “My Lord”, call Him “the Most Gracious”, call him “the Most Kind” while you are praying to Him. When you please God, He pleases you.
9. Be righteous (5:27). God only accepts prayers from righteous people (5:27).
10. Worship Him (2:186). God says in the Quran, “When my WORSHIPERS ask you about Me, I am always near. I answer their prayers when they pray to me…” So, God answers prayers of His WORSHIPERS.

Preferably, pray to God when you are alone (19:3, 2:271, 65:64), in a humble position (7:55, 6:63, 39:9), or even prostrating (39:9), at dawn (51:18), and when you are emotionally unstable either being in fear or hoping for something, or joyful or sad, and even better if you are crying (53:60). Now, let me show you how to pray, the best prayer, the best dua, which if you say it, God will answer it, guaranteed:

The Prayer (Dua):

My Lord, there is no god other than You. Be You glorified. I have wronged my soul. (21:87, 7:23, 28:16).

My Lord, please forgive me (7:151, 11:3, 11:90, 12:92, 14:41, 23:109, 23:118, 28:16, 38:24, 38:35, 51:18, 110:3, 2:285, 7:155, 59:10, 60:5, 3:16, 3:135, 3:147, 40:55, 2:286, 3:193, 7:155). I beg you (52:28, 11:90, 11:47, 110:3, 3:38, 4:32).

You are the Most Merciful (7:151, 12:92, 23:109, 23:118, 11:90, 2:128, 12:98, 52:28, 59:10).

I repent to you (11:3, 11:90, 38:24, 7:156, 46:15).

Save me from the retribution of Hell (40:7, 3:16, 2:201, 3:191, 26:87).

You are the Redeemer (110:3, 2:128).

My Lord, protect me from the devils (12:23, 14:35, 40:9, 23:97, 23:98, 40:27, 113:1-5, 114:1-6, 2:286).

Guide me in the right path (1:6, 28:22, 18:10)

Give me steadfastness, wisdom, and strength (7:126, 3:147, 20:31, 2:129, 26:83).

My Lord, grant me victory over the disbelievers (2:286, 3:147, 7:89, 23:26, 23:39, 26:118, 29:30, 60:5, 10:85, 10:86).

You are the Almighty (2:129, 40:8, 60:5).

My Lord, give me good things in this world, and give me good things in the next world (2:201, 7:156, 2:126, 28:24, 3:194, 4:32).

Admit me into the company of Your righteous worshipers (27:19, 27:59, 40:8, 7:151, 5:84, 23:94, 25:74, 26:83, 26:85, 3:193, 3:194).

You are the Most Kind (52:28, 3:8, 59:10, 38:35, 11:90).

Our Lord, let our spouses and children be a source of joy for us (25:74).

My Lord, have mercy on me, my parents, my family, and all the believers (17:24, 26:86, 26:169, 27:19, 2:286, 23:118, 12:92, 14:41, 23:109, 23:118, 3:8, 7:155, 12:98, 18:10, 46:15, 59:10).

I believe you, my Lord (3:16, 23:109, 3:53, 3:193, 5:83, 5:84, 7:89, 10:85).

You are the Hearer of the prayers (3:38, 2:127, 14:40).

Thank you, my Lord (27:19, 46:15, 14:7).

How the Prayer was Constructed?

This prayer (dua), was constructed by all the verses of the Quran where prayers are made, and they are simply a list of all the prayers (duas) in the Quran. So, this is a general-purpose voluntary prayer which anyone can make, and it essentially includes all the prayers of the Quran. Of course, your prayer does not have to be like this. It can be partially like this, but in that case, it is going to be partially answered –  you might ask for cookies for example and you get bread, but you always get something good, because God is good. God is better than your mother. So, whenever you pray to God, God definitely does something about it; He may grant it, grant it partially, grant it later, or forgive some of your sins. All of them are good. If you have no sins, and your prayer is perfect like this one, then there is only one choice: God grants your prayer. Now, here is where it gets complicated. What if you your father prayed something about you and it is in conflict with what you prayed? In that case, your father’s prayer is given priority. Prayer is like planting a tree. If your father planted an apple tree, and you want to plant an orange tree in the same place, the orange tree is not going to grow, because the apple tree is already there and you cannot cut it. It could be even worse. If your father did not pray at all, you are like an abandoned child in the desert with no trees; you might still survive but you will probably end up poor. And it will seem like God is not answering your prayers, and it might not seem fair, but that is simply how it works. God answers prayers in the order they are received, ceteris paribus; and your father had a chance to make his prayer or not make is prayer before you did. It gets even more complicated when the prayers are made partially correct by people, and they are answered partially, and then they get in conflict with one another, and part of one prayer is mixed the part of another prayer and millions of other prayers. It should be called ‘prayer jungle’, but people call it ‘luck’, because they don’t understand how these things work. Our fate is 100% correlated to previous prayers, the prayers of our ancestors, the prayers of angels, even Satan’s prayers; for example, we all have one common fate, death (21:35). This is because God is answering Satan’s prayer. Satan prayed to God, “Give me a respite until the day of resurrection” (7:14), and God gave him respite (7:15). Satan prayed before all of us, and he got his prayer answered. The more time passes, the more prayers are in existence, and the more likely it is that your prayer will be in conflict with previous prayers, and when the people in Hell pray to take them out (23:107), they will not be answered (43:77). Some people might say, “If God has already decided everything, including what you will get during your life, then why do we need to pray to Him? Is it going to change anything?” (7:164). Well it is true that God has already decided what people will get during their lifetime, and he has decided to give it both to those who pray and those who do not pray (2:126), but he also has decided who will get it deservedly (28:56). If He thinks you are one of the deserving ones, He will make you pray first and then give you the provision. And if He thinks that you are not of the deserving ones, then He will give you the provision before you get the chance to pray (17:18). Everything belongs to God (4:126), and any time you get something without having asked Him, you in are in fact stealing. No owner likes it when you get something from them without asking for it. But when you say, “Can I have it please?”. They might say, “Here you go. I was going to give it to you anyway, but thank you for asking.” Now, the best form of prayer is the Contact Prayer (Salat) (29:45) which is mandatory at specific times of the day (4:103), and it is more than just prayer; it’s also glorification (2:130), worship (20:14), and physical obedience to God (2:43), but in this article, we were talking about spontaneous voluntary prayer (Dua) (10:12), whenever you are emotional and need to talk to God (21:90), when you feel like you need something from God (40:60). See, wishes come from Satan (15:3), and prayer is simply a way to turn your evil wish into a positive request from God (6:43). It’s like telling Satan, you wanted to seduce me by giving me that wish, but look I have turned it into a form of worship for God.

Why Should Marriage Exist?

Marriage is a merger agreement (25:54), between a male and a female (42:50, 27:55), who are not blood-related (25:54). It’s neither an obligation, and neither a right. It’s a big privilege and a blessing (43:12-3, 42:12). But why should marriage exist? Why shouldn’t males and females just mate like the animals do without getting married?

Well, the animals also have a process through which they earn the right to mate. It’s called force. For example, two rams will fight, or two giraffes, or two lions, or two stallions, and so on, to earn the right to mate with a female counterpart. And among animals the benefits of this outweigh the damages, because then the offspring will be more fit to survive the harsh environment of this world. And this process of selecting a mate continued even among the human-shaped beings, Neanderthals in Europe, Denisovans in Asia, and the so-called Sapiens in Africa (21:95-96, 18:93-94). But, then God created Adam and Eve in the Fertile Crescent (2:35), independently of the other human-shaped beings (3:59, 55:14), and the only fundamental difference between Adam and Eve compared to the other human-shaped beings was the word which God gave Adam and all his descendants – us (2:37, 2:33, 7:35). This ability for abstract speech enabled us to reach agreements (70:32), and marriage is an extension of our ability to reach and keep agreements. Now, this same ability to reach agreements also enabled the children of Adam to organize in building such deadly weapons, and other far extending skills (14:46), and had they tried to select the mates through force, due to their far extending skills, then the damages would outweigh the benefits, which would be far worse than the mating process among animals (25:44). More men would die during the process of selecting a female, than children would be born, and this is not beneficial for humankind. So, because God’s word which He gave to humans gives them both the ability to reach agreements and be catastrophically deadly when they use force (17:70), then the only way to mate for humans without causing wars is by reaching agreements, which is marriage. All the other methods of multiplying do more harm than benefit to the humankind, even when it doesn’t look like that (25:68, 22:48). So, marriage is a way to prevent fighting and wars between men. This means that in the future, in the last days, when adultery and involuntary celibacy fully dominate marriage (because states will unavoidably fully replace fatherhood (31:33, 12:7-24)), there will be no fate for those people except war (48:28). The last generation cannot escape war. But, while God has still left marriage as a very big blessing among us (16:53), let’s learn about the rules of marriage (75:19).

The Rules of Marriage

The rules of marriages are very simple. All you need is:

1. Mutual agreement between the man and the woman (4:24), and the permission of her family or the government. (The Arabic Quran demands us to ask the permission of her “ahlihinna” (4:25), which literally means her “people”, which includes either her family or the government, or both, depending on the circumstances. They are all her people; by whom she is protected, depending on her independence level from her parents).
2. Dowry (4:24), (which may be a financial guarantee for the woman, or a state registered marriage (which is a government guarantee for the woman)).
3. Two witnesses, at least (2:282, 5:5). (They can be family members preferably, or close relatives, or close friends, or so on, or those government officials as a less preferred alternative, because it is harder to find them again, if you ever need them to testify about your marriage. This means that engagements or marriages can not happen online. The bride and the groom must be there seeing one another for real, and the witnesses must be live. Of course, other people may participate online, if it suits them like that, but they don’t count as witnesses. There is no such thing as online witnessing for such an important matter, or online engagements or online marriage (4:21). By the way, you are also not allowed to keep the marriage a secret (5:5). This is exactly why we need witnesses. The main difference between marriage and adultery is that it is not a secret. If you keep your marriage a secret, that is adultery. On the other hand, if you publicize your adultery, it becomes 1.8 times adultery (24:2, 24:4). But anyway, regarding the witnesses, through whom your marriage becomes a public agreement, and not a secret, when you invite the people to witness the agreement, you owe them lunch or dinner, because you are not allowed to harm the witnesses (2:282), and that is a compensation for their time. If you want to invite 100 witnesses, that is your choice, but you have to give all of them lunch or dinner (33:53), and if they agree to travel from a far, you have to pay their traveling expenses. Or you can do the marriage with only a few witnesses, and then invite the others only as guests, which would be a wedding or dinner after marriage, or you can invite all of them, at the moment when you are getting married, and all of them are guests and witnesses at the same time, which means that the marriage and the wedding happen at the same time. Either way is fine. So, giving food and comfort to the witnesses is the wedding. There is no need to hold a wedding in the style which is understood in certain cultures. Simply giving food and comfort to the witnesses is the weeding, regardless if you call it a wedding or not. And also, you are responsible for what happens at your wedding or marriage. You should not let the people use your wedding or marriage ceremony as an excuse to dress immodestly. Feel free to prohibit them at the door, if they do not fulfill the minimum requirements of dressing modestly, and if you are going to invite non-submitters as well, make sure to remind them beforehand about the dress code, or talk to them somewhere outside without causing any drama, or just don’t invite non-submitters. You can do the marriage pretty much anywhere; at an official marriage state office, or in a restaurant, or in your yard, or in your house.

Contrary to common expectations of religious people, marriages actually should not happen in places of worship. Marriages are important unions approved by God, but at the same time they are worldly business (28:27), and business is prohibited in places of worship. Christians and some recent Muslims have invented the idea of marriages in a places of worship, but none of any people mentioned in the Bible or the Quran ever got married in a place of worship. You may use the yard of the mosque for that, or some adjacent building or the hallway which leads to the mosque, but not the actual prayer area in the mosque which should be used only for worshipping God (72:18).

So, these are the three requirements of marriage, and that’s it. And in most cases today, in state registered marriages, all those requirements are fulfilled automatically, because the state will demand that you sign a document which is the agreement, and they will witness it (or at least give you space to bring more closely related witnesses), and the state will indirectly guarantee the woman’s rights with their own budget, which is her dowry. So, this is marriage.

By, the way, because the rules of marriage are only three and simple, it would be more helpful if we did not impose additional conditions to ourselves and to others through peer pressures, and cultural norms (29:25) – conditions such as certain extravagant wedding celebrations (17:27), or certain culturally imposed expensive dresses, or certain singers, or things like that (17:27). The extravagant are brethren of the devils (17:27). And although, a lot of those cultural norms may be allowed celebrations (7:32), they discourage marriages by putting unnecessary barriers (7:86). If marriages were kept simple and righteous (25:63, 25:67), more people would get married, and more often, and earlier (25:68, 16:112).

Now, the word “nikah” which is used in the Arabic Quran means both marriage and engagement at the same time. It’s the same thing, from the Quranic legal perspective. So, you don’t need to have both an engagement and a marriage ceremony. You may do so, if you wish, or if a certain situation demands it, but just be aware that you would be repeating the same thing. So, in cases when you reach your agreement in the state offices, just call it a marriage. And even in cases where you want to reach the agreement outside of the state offices, it’s still better to call it a marriage, but you may also choose to call it an engagement, if you wish, if you reach the agreement without any concrete plans to move and live together in the near future. In this case, when you call it an engagement, once you move together, or once you have sexual relations, you just switch into calling yourself married, in your social media status, for example, or things like that, and you don’t need to have a second ceremony. Either way is fine.

However, in case your marriage or engagement fails, then you should make sure to use the appropriate words in English, depending on what happened. If you break it up after sexual intercourse, you must call it “a divorce”, regardless of whether you called it an engagement or marriage in the beginning, and if you break it up before sexual intercourse, you must call it “breaking the engagement”, regardless of whether you called it marriage or engagement in the beginning. This may seem like a later retroactive shift of definitions, but because of the incomplete match between the English and the Arabic definitions, it is better to shift the definitions afterwards than to implicitly accuse someone for something which did not happen, because in the English language and culture, if you say that someone got divorced, when they actually did not even sleep together, if we take into consideration what the word “divorce” implies in the English culture, it is sort of an implicit accusation of immorality, or something more than what really happened, and the Quran prohibits that (24:11-18).

Now, marriages are not allowed with certain people.

We are not allowed to marry:

• Idol worshipers (who openly agree that they worship other than God, or God and someone else) (2:221).
• People for whom definite proof of adultery exists, unless you are also a proven adulterer (24:3).
• People of the same gender (26:165-166, 42:50).
• Women who are already married (4:24, 24:32).
• Our parents (4:23), (which according to the Quran also includes our grandparents and great-grandparents (2:133)).
• Our children (4:23), (which according to the Quran also includes our grandchildren and great-grandchildren (2:211).
• Our siblings (4:23).
• Our aunts or uncles (4:23).
• Our nephews or nieces (4:23).
• Our foster mothers (4:23).
• People with whom we shared the same foster mother (4:23). (which very often includes our first cousins, because often our mothers and aunts helped each other to raise the children).
• Our parents-in-law (4:23)
• Our sons-or-daughters-in-law (4:23).
• Our siblings-in-law (4:23)
• Women who were previously married to our fathers (4:22).

Also, if you are a divorcee, there are additional prohibitions regarding whom you can marry, and under which conditions you are allowed to marry again, and these additional prohibitions or limitations emerge from the divorce laws, but before I explain that, let me first talk about divorce in general.

The Rules of Divorce

Both men and women have the freedom to initiate divorce (2:226-227, 33:28). If they divorce before they had sexual intercourse, that divorce is not even a sin (2:236, 33:49), and in that case, they should call it “breaking the engagement”, not divorce. If they divorce after they had sexual intercourse, they should call it a divorce, and that divorce is a tolerated sin. After sexual intercourse, both believing men and believing women should try to avoid divorce as much as they can, and there are rules in the Quran which are designed to prevent unnecessary divorce (4:128). First of all, it is not right to make difficulties for your spouse in order to pressure them to initiate divorce (65:1). A healthy dose of kindness, tolerance, and respect is required from both parties (4:19). And also it is prohibited for others to behave towards couples in such a way to incite one of them to initiate divorce (2:102), especially if the couple are both submitters.

Now, there are two types of divorce:

1. Sharp divorce which is because of adultery (65:1, 4:19) or incompatible religious differences (4:24, 60:10), and
2. Soft divorce which happens due to other reasons.

In cases of a sharp divorce, there is no need for consultation with families, and there is no waiting period before the spouse decides to divorce (4:24, 65:1). And after the divorce, the parties do not maintain amicable relations. They should try to the best of their ability to never contact each other again, and never meet each other again. Not even in the street, or their child’s birthday party, or taking trips together for the sake of the children, or things like that. None of that (60:9). And remarrying each-other is prohibited forever for them (24:3), unless the wrong party publicly confesses that they have repented, changed their religious beliefs, and joined the submitters. Otherwise, it’s a permanent divorce with no turning back (60:10, 24:3). Not even children should be a reason to return to friendly amicable relations (60:9-10).  Now, you do not have to divorce someone just because they committed adultery or just because you have religious differences (66:10-11). However, if you do that, then it’s forever, and friendly relations should completely be cut off, not even in social media, and if you see that person in the street, you should continue as if you never knew them. Also, if someone divorces a non-submitter, he or she is not allowed to marry a non-submitter again (6:10).

Now, soft divorce may happen for reasons other than adultery or incompatible religious differences. In case of a soft divorce, there are procedures which need to be followed, depending on whether the husband or the wife wants to initiate the divorce. If the husband wants to initiate the soft divorce, first, the partners should discuss their problems (4:34). If that doesn’t work, they should give each other some individual space for personal reflection, by sleeping in separate rooms, if possible, and try to decrease their time together, maybe the wife can go to her parents for some days, or the husband can go to a short outdoors trip (4:34). If that doesn’t help at all, then they should involve their family members in the discussion, to hopefully help them (4:35). Then, he must stop the sexual relations for four months. Anytime during those four months, he may change his mind and go back to his wife, and continue with the marriage. If not, he then should officially express the divorce at the end of the four months (2:226), in the presence of two witnesses (65:2), or through the state procedures, whichever applies. After the divorce, if the home belonged to the woman, then the man must leave. If the home belongs to both, then they split it, or split the living space, and preferably sell it, take their portion, and move to separate places. If the home belonged to the man alone, and she has nowhere to go, no property, then he is not allowed to exclude her from the house (65:1). She is still allowed to live in the same house or in the rooms in which she lived before as mandatory charity from the man. They are divorced, and they are prohibited for one another, but she is allowed to stay there, or she can leave, if she wants. But, if they are renting, or he does not fully own the house, he is not obliged to do that. The woman may keep the dowry, because he initiated the divorce (2:229), unless she forgives parts of it, to adjust the situation to a fair division, especially if she knows that the state has supported her side more (2:229). And the woman must wait for three months after the divorce, as an emotional detox, and to double check that she is not pregnant (2:228), after which she is free to marry someone else, but if she finds that she is pregnant, she must wait until the end of her pregnancy (2:228). So, these were the procedures when the man initiates the soft divorce.

Now, if the woman initiates the soft divorce, everything is the same as if the husband initiated it, except that the woman can not choose to stay in her ex-husbands property anymore (33:28), because it was her choice to divorce. She must leave, unless it is her property. And she must return the financial dowry, if it was of the financial nature. The soft divorce may be retracted twice (2:229), regardless of who initiated it.

By the way, what happens in a marriage stays in that marriage (2:187). At the moment of divorce, you may give the general reasons why you divorce someone, in front of two witnesses, preferably in a written and signed document, or whatever the state requires, if that is the case, but after that you keep your mouth shut for the rest of your life. You do not reveal anything from that life, or private information regarding your ex-spouse (2:187) – not to your new spouse, not to anyone. If your ex-spouse reveals or publicizes something from your previous private life or private discussions, private pictures, or anything like that, you may respond in the same way, but never do it first (8:58). It’s an extremely bad behavior and a betrayal of those who have previously trusted you (8:27).

Now, regardless of who initiated the divorce, if they had children, it is better not to split up the children, because siblings are used to one another. For each parent, it is wrong to leave their children, so I would encourage both the father and the mother to try to do their best to keep their children, through any reasonable legal means. And that is what any good mother or father would do. However, there are no religious arguments which would be powerful enough to show that the other parent has no right to keep the children. And when the arguments are not powerful enough, power becomes a legitimate argument (26:4). So, in the past, the husband showed his power, and said “I am keeping the children. What are you going to do about it?” So, the show of power is a legitimate argument in this case (26:4), because both parties are right for the same thing. However, the governments these days will show even bigger power, and they might say, “She is keeping the children. What are you going to do about it?” or they might say, “She is keeping the children for 70% of the time or 50% of the time. What are you going to do about it?” And again, power is a legitimate argument in this case (26:4), because no other Quranic arguments exist. However, there are Quranic implications to this. When the mother achieves the keeping of her children, she inherits limitations with it. She, a divorced woman with minor children, is not allowed to marry again, unless she shows or sends to her new husband-to-be a concrete guaranteed plan in writing on how she will be able to fulfill these four conditions in her new marriage:

1. Not abandon her minor children willingly (66:6).
2. Never leave the new husband alone with her previous children in private spaces, or put them or him in situations where they are indirectly forced to be alone in private spaces while she is not there.
3. Never expect financial help from him for them. (This last part is actually almost always enforced by the governments anyway, through child support laws, which consider the biological father of the children to be financially responsible for them, even after divorce.)
4. Never meet her ex-husband or talk to her ex-husband without the new husband’s permission, even if it has to do with her children (4:34). And the new husband may choose to be there, if he wishes.

And this plan should not rely on the mercy or cooperation of her ex-husband, but she may rely on the cooperation of her family. And, she may also present a plan B which fulfills these conditions, and if she breaks any of these conditions, he is allowed to re-discuss the plan, or divorce.

And these conditions stem from different rules in the Quran, and especially from the fact that the Quran allows foster mothers or stepmothers but it does not allow foster fathers or stepfathers for children whose father is still alive. Children are allowed to be left alone in private spaces only with their family members or close relatives, or a foster mother (33:55, 24:31). Now, the new husband is not any of these, and therefore the mother is responsible to never leave them alone with him at home or in private spaces, without her presence there. There is no such thing as a stepfather in the Quran, only mom’s husband. Also, did you know that about 1 in every 5 girls who grows up with a stepfather is sexually abused by him, and even in cases where it does not happen, it’s because the man has to act like a servant in his own house, which is then emotionally unfair to him. And, even if the child is a boy, it’s still unfair towards the child, because that would technically be enslavement. No one has the right to subject someone’s children to someone else’s authority, while his mother is not there. That’s what the brothers of Joseph did with Joseph. They took him out of their father’s home, and he ended up in another man’s home, while his mother was not there with him. That’s enslavement. Now, if the child is with the mother, that’s not enslavement, but if she leaves the child alone with her new husband, that’s enslavement. It’s not enslavement the other way around, by the way, when a divorced father with children marries a new wife, because even when the children are under the authority of the new wife, she is under his authority (4:34), and therefore all of them are still under his authority – whatever authority still applies these days.

So, because the governments today have empowered the women to keep the children after divorce, they have disempowered them to marry again without fulfilling those four conditions, for which they must have a concrete plan, which they must present to their potential new husband, before they marry. One such plan could be, for example, that from Tuesday to Friday, she keeps the children at home, but she guarantees that she will always leave home after the husband or at the same time, and come back from work before the husband, so that the child is not left alone with the husband, and even when she is home, she should not leave the husband in one room with the child, and go to another room, unless the door is open. Then, on Friday, she sends the children to their grandmother or grandfather. On Saturday, their father picks them up from their grandmother, and returns them back to their grandmother on Sunday or Monday, and then the mother takes them from their grandmother’s place on Monday, and then repeat again next week. This is just one example, but you can have a different plan. Maybe the plan might simply involve owning a bigger house with separate entrances for the husband and the children, or things like that, but as you might be able to imagine, all these plans require additional efforts and additional finances from the wife. And someone might say, “Why does the Quran not mention these rules for widows who are also single mothers, and we know that the Quran allows the men to marry them?” Well, the natural expectation in the Quran is that single mothers should directly jump into a polygamous marriage (one man marrying two divorced mothers with children). Verse 4:3, which mentions this permission, mentions two, three, or four, wives, but skips one, meaning that the idea of marrying only one single mother is not presented there at all. It goes directly to two, because women in the past did not provide for themselves, and it was impossible for them to fulfill these four conditions with additional finances and efforts. So, the only option for a single mother in the past was polygamy. But today, because women work, single mothers might be able to avoid polygamy in a new marriage, simply by investing additional finances into the problem, but still polygamy would be for them the only option which does not require additional finances and efforts, because in that case, the husband stays at the other wife’s home, whenever she needs quality time with her children, and then he comes back when the other wife needs quality time with her children. And no additional efforts or finances are needed from either woman in that case. So, verse 4:3, recommends two single mothers, in cases when we are concerned about the rights of their children, and it recommends one single mother, in cases when we are concerned about the rights of the mother. And generally, in circumstances of poverty, due to incompatible living space, and heavy efforts which are required to make it work, the rights of the children are at risk, but in richer circumstances, in general, due to sufficient space arrangements, the rights of children are fulfilled, which means that the rights of women then should be given priority. So, generally, in cases of a poor single mother, especially if she does not have the help of her family, or the state, then the best option is polygamy, and in case of definitely rich single mothers with sufficient support, the best option is monogamy.

And I understand that this might sound humiliating for the poor women of today, but the humiliation only lasts a few days until she realizes that the husband always comes back, especially if the other woman is a good person who will not try to “steal” her husband. And by the way, this is one among the only four unnatural special cases where the Quran allows polygamy as an admitted problem (4:129), in order to solve a bigger unnatural problem. Otherwise, in all the other natural circumstances, the Quran preaches monogamy (4:1, 7:189, 39:6, 78:8, 49:13, 11:40, 23:27, 51:49, 43:12, 34:46, 3:195, 53:45, 92:3, 4:129), which is the natural way, because from the first day God created one man and one woman.

But, in the case of divorced women with children, it is an unnatural situation, and it may be solved with either polygamy, or with additional efforts and finances by the woman. And admittedly, if you are a single mother, this might be a difficult situation, but think of the women who never get married. We are going towards a world where 50% of the women will never get married, while at least you have a child, which means that you are not completely alone. And even though the Bible says that marrying a widow is a good charitable deed, actually a widow and a divorced woman are not exactly the same thing, and also, these days, the women who are in their thirties and above and did not get married yet are closer to the widows of the past than the divorced women with children.

So, a smart choice for women in democracies would be to marry early and have children slightly later, to reduce the chances of such a situation. Contraception methods may be used (7:32). You can ask the appropriate doctors about that, and if either the man or the woman does not want children, they both should agree not to have children (4:29), or the party who definitely wants children may choose to divorce, but they should not force or scheme children into a marriage. So, because of the existence of contraception methods these days, it is recommended for the potential couples to talk about whether they would eventually expect children in a marriage and how many, to avoid later disagreements. And, of course, ultimately God is in control of everything (42:49-50).

So, this is all you need to know about marriage and divorce, but most importantly, remember this: No matter who comes and goes in your life, or who comes and stays in your life, you should focus on serving God, and don’t let anyone divert you from that. If you can find a submitter and righteous person who will support you in the cause of God, even better. If not, don’t stop striving in the cause of God, on your own.